If I knew how bad social media could be for my kids, I wouldn’t have given them the phone. They are now in their late teens to his early 20s and are grappling with issues like eating disorders, addiction and sexuality. I feel completely screwed. what can i do?
As a counselor, I have observed the profound impact social media has on young people. Children who were given devices too early and failed to be educated, discipled, and accountable are now suffering from severe addiction tendencies, depression, dissatisfaction, anxiety, eating disorders, bullying, risky behavior, and FOMO. I am working on a problem.
Rather than being a source of wisdom, social media can create values that alienate young people from Christ and the biblical worldview. It promotes worldly wisdom, and you inadvertently gave them access to that world.
This is a common parenting mistake. We often take cues from what other parents are doing. If the families around us, especially Christian families, allow such things, I think it’s fine. Maybe you don’t want to deprive your child of what others seem to have. Perhaps you feared being typecast as “lone parent,” “overprotective,” “too strict,” or holding back your children from moving forward across generations. These fears turn away from appreciating what is wise and good, toward ideals that everyone else seems to have found.
In hindsight, it’s easy to see that this approach could lead to unfortunate choices and dire consequences for the family. Perhaps your daughter’s world has been shaped and consumed by social media. Your son may have been lured and trapped by her porn online. Since everyone lives in their own world and separates their relationships from each other, your home may be quiet.
you are not alone. Many parents ask themselves why they went with the flow or didn’t jump ship when they saw the warning signs. But this is not the end of the story. there is hope
God’s mercy is new every morning. Here are the steps you can take:
repent
Admit and confess your wrong decisions and admit that you regret them. It’s best to own your regrets in front of your kids (I’ve done this myself). Doing it in front of our children helps them look into our hearts and understand that we are human and that we have regrets (and the right way to deal with regrets). as well).
And trust God to accept even our failures and bring beauty out of the ashes.
Every parent can reflect on their parenting journey and identify things they would do differently if they could. All you can do now is recognize the choices you have made, evaluate the reasons for them, and ask the Lord for wisdom to move forward.
Many parents are asking themselves why they went with the current trend. But this is not the end of the story. there is hope
Advance
So? Is it too late for my children? Have you lost them in the abyss of social media, technology and values of this culture?
It’s never too late.
It may be much more difficult, but it’s never too late. follow your kids. Be persistent in begging them to return to their relationship with themselves and with the Lord. Camp patiently on the doorstep of their lives. God can redeem all that is lost or broken.
Here are some practical tips I recommend for moving forward with your kids.
- Before you do anything, pray (1 Thess. 5:17). We can force our way into our children’s lives, or we can affectionately persuade them. Ask God to give you discernment to know how to approach your children.
- Look for ways to relate and engage with them, even if they resist. what are their interests? What makes them happy? Find ways to connect with their world and show them that you care. Take her out to the movies, take her out for dinner or coffee, go hiking, or offer to join her in her favorite pastime. The more they feel known and understood by you, the more likely you are to gain their trust.
- Connect with them online. They may be hiding in social media, but they can also learn a lot about how they present themselves to the world. Let’s learn. What draws them to a particular site, person, or object? Where do their values, temptations, and struggles become apparent? When we pray for them and try to speak to their lives , this gives you some insight.
- Ask reflexive questions. Instead of simply confronting them about all the negative ramifications of materialism, immorality, unhealthy relationships and comparisons, envy, vulgar talk, etc., ask what people think about what they post. Let them talk about how they experience life online.
- Help them develop critical thinking. Find thoughtful ways to work with them on the worldview they’re absorbing. Instead of going into lecture mode, encourage conversation. We want children to learn to distinguish between right and wrong, to debate and interact in ways that move them toward the truth.
- Please paint a better picture for them. This world vividly depicts joy, identity, success, beauty, romance and morality. But you and I can do better. What God has to offer is far more fulfilling and truly life-giving, whether it’s a trip down a kayak down a river, laughing at a family game night, celebrating a wedding, or honoring someone’s fruitful service. It is our pleasure to invite them to all things. And we’ll see how God’s law makes beautiful and logical sense.
It’s easy to get discouraged when you think your children won’t respond. Galatians 6:9 reminds us to never tire of doing good by believing, “If you don’t give up, you will reap the harvest” (NIV).
Please do not give up. Pursue tenaciously. The harder you try to instill in your family the truth and ways of God, the more chances it will bear fruit. Show your children what is good, righteous, and holy, and then trust God to act. he is loyal